Critical Space

I read somewhere that bears, like humans and other animals have a “critical space”— an area around them that they will defend. Once you enter a bear’s critical space, you may force the bear to act—and even become aggressive. The size of the critical space is different for every bear and situation.

During my re-parenting process, I learned how to become my own mama bear. This piece is a metaphor of that learning. After years of mothering and trying to give to others what I unknowingly had never experienced as a child, my adult self began to disintegrate at a sub-atomic level. Without warning, I became dangerously aware of being floaty and vapor like. I moved through and lived in the critical space of other peoples’ lives. I became a phantom or more like a death eater—resenting the more solid folks around me.

Since then, my solid mama bear self continues to consolidate and re-inform my existence. I have fierce loyalty to this awareness and continue to work at protecting my own critical space.